Hello guys (:
I've been wanting to write an entry but since I was too busy, I really can't make it. Ugh we had semester break for 2 weeks (yeah only 2 weeks can y'all believe it??) and the holiday was filled with annual camp. I've started January with final exams and end it with camp. I was totally exhausted. Within January, I managed to applied undergraduate research project (it's as if pre- final year project) and got the approval from my supervisor. Looking forward to work with her later.
Anyways, y'all can tell what am I gonna talk in this entry, it's obvious right. That's right, bubs. My pet name for my dear crush (don't judge) and don't proceed if y'all don't feel like want to know this not-so-interesting story of mine. It's cringy topic tho and I've warned y'all okay. So I've been single for a while and yeah, having crush is a different thing kan hahahahaha maybe this will remain as a crush, just that.
Who is he? He's someone that I can't say that I know him so much because we didn't communicate a lot. This just sparks while in the camp. I've acknowledged his presence since last year but paid a little attention to him. Ouhya, he joins airforce as well so when I started to mention him a lot in my whatsapp status, this kinda caught attention of my fellow friends. And they really had the audacity to make a guess of him. Can't really blame them since they know him. Can't say yes or no to their guesses but of course let's play a game with em hahhahaha oh gosh I feel bad but funny at the same time. Thanks to him, my dull and stressful days of camp feel lighter and happier uwu (thanks to my buddies esp my roommates too okay, can't forget them lorh)
Why him? For me, he's super friendly. Tho we barely talk before this. I can see that he's a good boy, listen well and lil naughty. But gosh, all of it just a surface from him. I don't know him that well but I want to. Still, he wouldn't let me in that easy. He talks really casual with me and make me comfortable the moment we started talking. Thanks a lot for that. And he has charms that I can't even describe. Yknow, your heart can feel it. I wish I can tell about it but I don't have words for it. I just like him okay. I'm kinda like him a lot (ok this is embarrassing)
To be honest, people really *not really laa* looked up to my progress since my crush kinda talk to me as well, chat and play around with me. Most of em thought me as a brave girl for doing this. So it became more chaos when he wanted to know my crush too. (yeap I let him see my status). Asking me who he is, not knowing he's the one that I like. It's funny because I keep hesitating either I should let him know or not. In another word, confess. Crazy isn't it? Because there's so many possibilities that could be.
He even joked, asking me if he's my crush. But I left him hanging. Lol why would you think that I would disclosure it like that eventho it's kinda smooth hahaha. Well yknow, I've this personality of telling things that other people might think twice before doing it. So confessing is one of it. Many of em encouraging me to tell him, so I did. But I did it indirectly. Thru ws status as well, just the same when he knew about my crush's presence.
I didn't know how he felt about it or how he really took the shocking news but he really shocked (as he asked me right after he saw my post). Keep asking me why I like him, kinda happy too. He said this was his first time encountered such a confession. Erm maybe I did a great job, didn't I?? Yeah maybe...
But, there's one sad truth behind everything of this. The starts of our conversations. The only topic to get some attention from him. That. He. Has. A. Crush.... He fucking has a crush. And his crush is my friend. It was cute and saddening at the same time. I know about it but yet I still confessed? Sounds stupid but maybe that's the most brilliant step that time. Lol jkjk. I always teased him about his crush, knowing that's the only topic that could catch his attention, that could keep our conversation longer and put a smile on his face. Ugh I'm disgustingly whipped for him. Does my friend know? Of course not.
As we keep chatting, he keep teasing me about my crush (he knows he's the one but we play pretend that I'd never confessed but....... Still he doesn't want to forget the fact that I like him). And we still talk about his crush. Even if it a mere second but I know he likes it. And I'll keep talking about her if it really can make his day :) we are still in a good terms, befriended because that's the only way we could still talk and joke around. I don't really care about it since I know the circumstances of liking him, the confession, and we are still friends. Can't blame him because I picked it, I chose it. I'm the one that responsible to any of it. I guess one day I'll move on, just maybe not now. I'm gonna cherish this moment of us, even though there's no "us" to begin with.
Erm I don't realize I write this much already hahahaha okay this is embarrassing. AND I already gave him link to this blog. He fucking left a comment with "bubs" on my previous entry LIKE CAN'T HE BE ANY CUTER UGH MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT go check it out hahahahahahaha omg I still can't believe it hehehe
If y'all have any question to me, leave a comment or hit me up at the chatbox okay fellas? Good night to everyone especially my bubs ewww don't be grossed out lol