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Hii y'all.. It's been a while since the last entry and it's kinda awkward to be here back. It's not that I want to permanently leave it but I'm just using this as a medium to share more about bangtan to sns. I didn't feel really good right now and that explains why no more entry about me ranting my feelings. To be honest, I want to, but since I've been suppressing my feelings a lot, I've become numb when it comes to words. Really, I can't even talk properly about it too.
It's weird how I want to rant more and more when I'm at twitter but when I'm here, I tried to make it simple but that's not the point why are blog is made ammirite? I become another person at different socmed, and it's really tiring. I don't want to but it happens occasionally. Hell, I can't even think of words that suitable now as I don't really write things. Yeah as I said I ranted more on twitter but since it has limited word, I tried to make it short. I've lost (or is it loss) many grammar because of this hahahaha silly me
Hmm actually things have been so rough for these few years, it's really hard that I even changed to this. This, what I mean is, someone that couldn't talk so much about feelings, can't speak freely with anyone, being too judgemental, easily getting triggered about silly stuff, getting paranoid over simple things, and so many more. It's not like I not like that before this, it's just this became worse and I don't like it, really. I want to talk about it but still, my mind my heart my conscience really don't want me to hahahahaha maybe after a while I guess. After I try to open up more, then I'll tell ya.
To be honest (okay is it time for confession lol), I tried to not say anything too much because I'm afraid I might spill more lies. Know when people said 'people who talk too much, tell more lies'?? Bet you've heard this anywhere. People like me, who have many secrets (more to dirty secrets), tend to make another lies to save themselves. And that's make it harder, because we need to remember the lies we told. It's not easy when the stories known to a quite number of people. It's hard to stay stick at A when you have different backgrounds of friends (or acquaintance). Because, when you have A group of friends, you need to tell em A lie. When it comes to B group of friends, you need to tell another lie, which is B lie. And it goes on to C, D, E and the list goes on.
I tried to make it simple but covering some of facts to make another lie. Haha, what am I doing right now omg. How silly am I. Nahh, I'm just explaining you why I don't like talking anymore. Eventho I'm reality life, I'm still a talkative person hahahahah it's not easy to become a silent person at all, pheww.
But here I am again, try to put all my feelings into words, to deliver things that my mouth can't say, to say things that have been wandering in my mind, to anonymous, random people or anyone. Should I cover my identity then? Hahaha oh gosh, I still dont feel at ease at all. Maybe it helps, a lil bit. But never mind, I wish things will get easier as the time flies. Y'all don't really get my point right? Issokay, I don't intend to do so lol..
Thank you for coming to my ted talk xoxo
2 comments:
hahaha i got your point dont worry. and i love to read your rant actually. dah kenapa tetibe den speaking ni kahkahhh.
and i hope you will be more honest with yourself and orang sekeliling. well, if not in real life, maybe you can share your true thoughts in this blog. kan? maybe as you said, it will help put you in ease a lil bit. chaiyok!
bak kata taehyung - it's not a big deal ;)
p/s: i love the seesaw song so much!
p/s lagi: harap faham my english because saya tak expert sangat in writing and speaking english hikhik
Annyeong eonni.i just wanna some things or just a few tips for you.
Some secret can't be kept for too long,we are,just humans we can't handle too much pressure.Try not to hold too much secret especially if they are not from your closest friends, because it may took a toll on your friendship life as it does to mine.But if it they are some huge secrets from your friends & relatives,they shared because they trust you,so keep them tight.
However if the secret is about your crushes/ people you have feelings for.i think its better if you just went straight to the point with him,if he's your friend and you're afraid you'll lose him as friends too,then no need to worry,if he is your true friend to begin with,if he does reject you he will keep on becoming your friend and your friendship will get better because of your honesty,well who knows he will develop same feelings as you later.Just remember,men can't really understand our feelings and actions.so if you have something to say to him,just do it.
Go get him tiger.Fighting.
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