[ Face Yourself ]

Hello peeps, Avie here. Just an ordinary girl who wants to share her 2cents and rant about stuff that only can be written, well have fun guys and do follow me. Btw, hit me up at the chatbox below yeayy. Thank you for coming to my ted talk xoxo

Monday 31 December 2018

promise












Promise?


Yeah. I’m gonna make a promise to myself, about me, my family, my friends and those around me (no matter if they would just a mere acquaintances or nothing at all)


Why tho?


I got this inspiration from my beloved oppa, jimin. He just released a song last night, entitled ‘Promise’. The lyrics hit me hard and I almost cry. It seems stupid but I guess we have different preferences. I’ve been hard to  myself; I feel useless, terrible, my existence is nothing, I can’t forgive myself for my past, I can’t get myself together, I let myself get stray away by this feelings.


I might have those who close to me but I have my own dark side, that I can assure you if they know, they would be disappointed with me. Can’t let them know (but I’m such a moronic for telling this here ammirite?) Nahh, I’m just giving some hint about myself. There are so many things that I hide, things that might scar people to life.


It’s been a while since I’m trying to love myself when I have is self-hatred, gradually polluting my mind, all the fake hopes I’m living with and all the fake love I’m trying to develop in my heart. I always have these thoughts of; I’m not good enough, that I don’t deserve good things, that I’m just good enough to be a sidekick, that I don’t belong here, that the misfortune really eat me up and so fucking more and believe me it’s the worst.


By saying this, I don’t think that I’m the only who always have these kind of negative vibe. I bet most people would feel the same, it’s just the severity isn’t the same, the level of self-hatred, the amount those people fake their smiles and laugh just to cover up the thoughts. Even if it just a mere seconds.
However, am not going to reveal the pathetic side of me. Instead, am going to just make a little promise to myself. To ensure I can love and treasure myself more. Things that people take lightly might be the biggest thing in others’ lives. It really depends on somebody’s liking.



So here we goes, my little promises (wish me luck bubs);


  • For me, I’m going to build up my confidence more. No matter how fucked up people seen me, but I guess showing them that they’re wrong is the best revenge.

  • I’m not going to throw myself away, even if I feel lonely multiple times in a day.

  • I’m gonna be honest to myself and not to abandon my feeling, gonna treat it like a softie. Sounds absurd because we sometimes forget to focus on our feelings for the sake of others’ happiness.

Bangtan said, face yourself so that you can love yourself.

  • So I’m gonna face all the weakness, shortcoming, flaw, imperfections. Those are the thing can hold me from being success and happy. Most important fact, I can’t love myself if I can’t embrace the imperfections part of me. Gonna embrace all of me and love myself because that’s the key of everything, love.



Anyways, here a short message for those whoever that ever came into my life within this year (':

Thank you for everything. And sorry for all my shortcomings. We might be in a good terms or maybe we're not. Things happened, people come and go. Those who stays, please stay longer. Let's make more memories, spend more time together, play around more. Those who gone, good luck with whatever you're doing. Forgive me, if it me who push you away or maybe it's me who makes you walk away from me. Still, everyone of you is part of my life. At some days, I would missed you too, I bet I miss the memories. Guys, whenever you're pls be careful, take care of yourself, eat a lot, play more, enjoy your life, spread more love, be happy and please, if you feel stressed, talk to anyone, rant somewhere and let it out. I hope 2019 will be a better year for all of us. Okay, time's up.

It's the ending of 2018, so Happy New Year bubs <3












I want you to be your light, baby. You should be your light. 


-lots of love, veeeavieee

13121 - Wish You Were Here - 032112
- A Fake :) Can Hide A Million T_T - ASSALAMUALAIKUM ~! (:

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Once a bubs always a bubs XD
Wish u the best and get urself more stronger and better from now and onwards bubs #grammarkelaut tp paham je kan haahaa